Capricorn

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Technically, I am a Gemini. However, I am nothing like one. More than anything else I resemble a Capricorn. Actually, I pretty much fit the mold exactly. And I'm not just talking in the good ways.

On the bright side I am patient, loyal, ambitious, trustworthy, self-reliant, appreciative, dependable and have copious amounts of self control.

On the dark side I am an over-critical, over-cautious, greedy, boring prude with an exaggerated interest with material possessions.

I wish this blog was coming to some kind of point. But it's not. I guess the point is I renounce my Gemini birth right for boring life of Capricornism.

So much wasted time!

I spent hours last night laying awake in bed, writing blogs to post once I got internet to my computer. Blogs that really came from my heart. This kind of raw emotion like I haven't been able to muster in months. It felt amazing. And now... I If I had posted them I would be deleting them now.

Why won't I let myself show emotion?

Again

There will never be a day when your name doesn't cross my mind. I can't fall asleep without putting my mind to rest from the thought of you. I will never hear someone make me a promise without thinking of your broken ones. I will never think of the past without having to push through the gate of you. Every corner of this town. Every movie. Every resuaraunt. Winter, Spring, Summer, Fall. People say I'm strong, and I think of you. People say I'm boring, and I think of you. The scars on my hands and top of my writsts. You are so much of who I am. I am who I am despite you. I am me because of dealing with me, because of you. It doesn't bother me. I'm generally at peace with it. But forgive me for speaking of it, it's who I am.

Remember

The sheepish, embarassed smile you get when you know you've said something wrong.

The spark in your eyes when you're playing your music.

The happiness that radiates, because someone's there.

The look on your face when I kiss your cheek when you're asleep.

The random shit you say, the way I have to skip through your thoughts and points to keep up.

How much I hate making you feel bad.

Growing Up

There was a girl. A girl who knew who she was and what she stood for. A girl who had her own opinions and her own rules. A girl unlike any other. A girl who spoke her mind, whatever the cost. A girl who suffered through a fair amount. Mean boys, bad friends, random tragedies and unfair parents at times. She  was a girl who never stop being her. 

Until now.

10 reasons

10 reasons I feel compelled to write a blog right now.

1. I want to say something worth reading.
2. I want to make a point.
3. My last post is freaking me out.
4. I'm bored.
5. I'm mildly irritated with a lot of things right now.
6. I'm always hoping a random stranger will stumble across my blog, like it, and fallow Parenthetical Me. Without me ever knowing.
7. I want someone to comment on a blog worth writing/reading.
8. I just feel like writing, okay?
9. Writing makes me face and feel my emotions. Which doesn't happen so often these days.
10. I love you.

Away From The Farm

These People Came in the Cafe today.

They're nicer than they look.