Pet My Peeves

Take my philosophy homework from my hands, and read it.
Look over my shoulder as I wrote down my econ notes.
Lean over and read my MPJs in Pop Novels.
I hate when people read my stuff when I don't ask them to.

Tell me my deadlines.
Then, the next day, tell me again.
Text me and ask if I'm done yet.
I hate when people remind me of how little time I have left.
I KNOW when it needs to be done. Thank you.

Take my phone from me.
I don't care if you don't want me texting people right now.
I know when it's simply not appropriate to text.
I don't care if you're a guy who wants to hold the hand my phone is in.
Chances are that's why it's there.
I hate when people take my phone.

Tell me about your skin problems.
Do you have a reoccurring case of shingles?
Have you had more than 5 staff infections?
Does your eczema keep you awake all night?
I hate when people complain about their decent skin.

Ask to take a "sip" of my drink... and swallow as much as you can in one gulp.
Assume because I said one, that means more.
Ask for a "bite" and stuff as much in your mouth as you possibly can.
If I payed for it, it's mine. Back off... Unless I say otherwise of course.
I hate when people eat my food.

Make fun of the way I talk.
If I have a lisp that day, laugh every time I say something weird.
Imitate the weird voices I don't know I make.
If I'm not laughing, I don't want it to be made fun of.
I hate when people make fun of my occasional speech issues.